They say that "Marriage will make you holy."
It's the truth, and I'm not even married yet!
I am getting married to a wonderful woman in 46 days, and I am very excited about it. God has truly given me a wonderful companion, and I don't think I know how lucky I am. I wanted to write a little about my experience over the last 200 days or so working up to my wedding day that I thought might benefit someone else someday.
So, my opening sentence was, "Marriage will make you holy." I should also add to that some advice that I got from my church: "Marry the woman that keeps you holy, not the woman that makes you happy." At first glance, it's somewhat a strange statement, but with some qualification, it makes a whole lot of sense. What I learned a few weeks ago, was it is God's wish to make us all joyful, not merely "happy." Joyful (I think) is what you get when you are walking with Christ. Buying a new car, or a new tool, or eating a hamburger will make you happy, but can you say it would make you joyful? I don't think so. Joyful is something you get when you follow Christ, and are living the way God intends for you to live. I want that. I want to live the way God intends. Anything short of that is certain death. And not necessarily physical death, but spiritual death, which I think might be worse. Jessica is definitely the woman who will keep me holy.
Nothing has brought me closer to God than being in this relationship with Jessica. My desire to be a good husband for her has really made me take a hard look at myself and being the process of rooting out my sin in order to be a better husband for her. Example: I am a terrible impulse spender. I'll buy anything shiny if I think it'll bring me a moment of fun. The Bible calls us men to be the spiritual leader in the house, which includes leading with finances. It's not to say that Jessica and I don't make all the financial decisions together, because we do. Rather, this is a call for me to die to my selfish desires for the benefit of the family; or my wife specifically. So I can't be out there buying every little BMW part I want, I need to be saving for her, and for what is best for the family, not just my vehicular desires.
This is a hard lesson for someone who is terrible about buying anything and everything for his car. I have a garage full of tools and parts intended to be installed on the car, but have sat, gathering dust. I love my car, and I love doing "car stuff," but I need to lead, and sacrifice my lust for car things, and take care of her first.
I think this is a hard lesson for many men. We men have so many things that we want, and want to do. We like sports, and cars, and gadgets, and all kids of "toys." Many times, men put these things before the needs of their wives, and their wives become resentful to their hobbies. I've seen it many times. I pray that I always put Jessica first, and keep my car hobby for when we have extra resources, and everything is taken care of already.
So when I say that "marriage makes you holy," this is the kind of thing I am talking about. I am not even married yet, but I am already feeling the effects of God working in my heart to change my way of thinking, and take care of Jessica first, then my other hobbies come a distant second. The great thing is: I feel better about myself, and my prospects of being a good husband. Score.
Tuesday, March 02, 2010
Monday, May 04, 2009
Keepin' it real
I know it's a trite title, but deal with it.
I think our generation (meaning generation x and generation y) are going to lead the technology backlash. I know this may be hard to believe coming from somebody like me, but I think it's coming.
Recently, I was down in Austin staying with my friends Matt and Andrea for an extended weekend. Trips to Austin are very relaxing for me, and give me a chance to reconnect with the Texan in me. I do love that hot weather, the BBQ, and the Mexican food. The Texas friendliness and laid back life style isn't bad either. It's a great place to be.
One morning, during my visit, I got up and sat on the couch in my friends' living room. I didn't turn on the TV, I just kinda sat there and relaxed and waited for my friends to get settled and come talk to me. From the kitchen, Matt asked, "You want some coffee?" "Sure!" I replied. About 10 minutes later, Matt asked, "Milk and sugar?" "Just milk," I replied. Matt slowly walked my mug over and handed it to me. I gracefully removed it from his hands and took a cautious sip, not knowing how hot it was. What happened next surprised me: it was the best coffee I'd ever had.
"What kind of coffee is this?" I don't even remember what kind he said it was, but he followed it up with, "I made it in our French Press; it makes better coffee."
Holy crap was it good. Of course, I had to go home and purchase one of these devices for myself, and you better believe I did. I'd never seen or had coffee from a French Press before, so this was a totally new concept for me. This experience, along with a few others lately have made me start thinking about the value of "real." It sounds abstract, but it's not. I'm not really an abstract kind of person, so I will make this very concrete for you. Bear with me just a second, while I set it up, and then bring it on home for you.
In our modern society we have all these things and devices that keep us connected electronically. In addition, we can have anything we want almost immediately. You want pizza? 30 minutes. Wii game that is out of stock? Amazon's got it and will have it on your doorstep tomorrow if you order in the next 35 minutes. Old lunchbox you had when you were 5? eBay's got it for $19.95 with the thermos included. The problem with having everything on demand is it's not fun, and we don't appreciate it. Plus, finding your old lunch box on eBay isn't a very interesting story. What happened to endlessly searching for and old Atari game or Star Wars toy at garage sales and antique malls? Part of the fun of finding something like that was the search! Plus buying it on eBay doesn't give you that human interaction that a garage sale might. It's just a transaction.
Our fast paced society has deprived us from the joy of cooking our own meals, and sitting in your living room and listening to an entire album from start to finish. Or what about taking a walk through a park and smelling real flowers and trees? I can't tell you how many deserted parks I've been to lately. Parks are free and quiet! There is some real value in taking time to appreciate this wonderful world God has given us, and not toil and fret about eating, or shopping, or cramming everything into your day. I retrieved my Dad's old record player from our basement last week, and I have made it a point to start listening to albums and not just songs. I'm also going to start baking my own bread, and taking more walks.
I've been horribly guilty of filling my life with crap and busyness. I'm want to break the cycle and spend more time enjoying the world around me. When I get home, I'm gonna make myself some coffee and listen to Led Zeppelin II.
I think our generation (meaning generation x and generation y) are going to lead the technology backlash. I know this may be hard to believe coming from somebody like me, but I think it's coming.
Recently, I was down in Austin staying with my friends Matt and Andrea for an extended weekend. Trips to Austin are very relaxing for me, and give me a chance to reconnect with the Texan in me. I do love that hot weather, the BBQ, and the Mexican food. The Texas friendliness and laid back life style isn't bad either. It's a great place to be.
One morning, during my visit, I got up and sat on the couch in my friends' living room. I didn't turn on the TV, I just kinda sat there and relaxed and waited for my friends to get settled and come talk to me. From the kitchen, Matt asked, "You want some coffee?" "Sure!" I replied. About 10 minutes later, Matt asked, "Milk and sugar?" "Just milk," I replied. Matt slowly walked my mug over and handed it to me. I gracefully removed it from his hands and took a cautious sip, not knowing how hot it was. What happened next surprised me: it was the best coffee I'd ever had.
"What kind of coffee is this?" I don't even remember what kind he said it was, but he followed it up with, "I made it in our French Press; it makes better coffee."
Holy crap was it good. Of course, I had to go home and purchase one of these devices for myself, and you better believe I did. I'd never seen or had coffee from a French Press before, so this was a totally new concept for me. This experience, along with a few others lately have made me start thinking about the value of "real." It sounds abstract, but it's not. I'm not really an abstract kind of person, so I will make this very concrete for you. Bear with me just a second, while I set it up, and then bring it on home for you.
In our modern society we have all these things and devices that keep us connected electronically. In addition, we can have anything we want almost immediately. You want pizza? 30 minutes. Wii game that is out of stock? Amazon's got it and will have it on your doorstep tomorrow if you order in the next 35 minutes. Old lunchbox you had when you were 5? eBay's got it for $19.95 with the thermos included. The problem with having everything on demand is it's not fun, and we don't appreciate it. Plus, finding your old lunch box on eBay isn't a very interesting story. What happened to endlessly searching for and old Atari game or Star Wars toy at garage sales and antique malls? Part of the fun of finding something like that was the search! Plus buying it on eBay doesn't give you that human interaction that a garage sale might. It's just a transaction.
Our fast paced society has deprived us from the joy of cooking our own meals, and sitting in your living room and listening to an entire album from start to finish. Or what about taking a walk through a park and smelling real flowers and trees? I can't tell you how many deserted parks I've been to lately. Parks are free and quiet! There is some real value in taking time to appreciate this wonderful world God has given us, and not toil and fret about eating, or shopping, or cramming everything into your day. I retrieved my Dad's old record player from our basement last week, and I have made it a point to start listening to albums and not just songs. I'm also going to start baking my own bread, and taking more walks.
I've been horribly guilty of filling my life with crap and busyness. I'm want to break the cycle and spend more time enjoying the world around me. When I get home, I'm gonna make myself some coffee and listen to Led Zeppelin II.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Friday, January 30, 2009
Wordle
My friends Evans and Otis did a "wordle"of their blog, so of course I had to do one too.
I love that the most common words I use are "Jessica," "made" and "love." Fantastic.
I love that the most common words I use are "Jessica," "made" and "love." Fantastic.
Monday, December 08, 2008
Thursday, December 04, 2008
7 things
My friend Lucy tagged me in her blog today, so I thought i might return the favor. Someone put her to the test on 7 random things that I suppose people may or may not know about her. Since I usually wear my heart on my sleeve, it's hard to think of 7 things people may not know about me. I'll give it a shot anyway:
1. I am a darn good cross-stitcher. About 3 months ago, I started on a little project for my pals in Austin, Jeremy and Jessica Jeremy actually gave me the idea from this website called Subversive Crossstitch. Basically it's a bunch of mildly to extremely offensive crossstitch patterns you can make. I am by no means an expert at crossstitching, but my mom taught me how to do it a number of years ago, and now I am pretty good at it.
2. I like ballet. Once a year, I like to go see the ballet. It's doesn't really fit with my typical "manly" activities like fixing the car, or rolling in the dirt with the dog, but I do enjoy it about once a year. I haven't gone since I lived in Austin, but I will probably go again sometime soon.
3. I like to bake. More specifically, I like to use my kitchenaid mixer. Jessica turned me on to this awesome piece of machinery about 2 years ago, and now I love to throw anything I can together and mix it all up.
4. I am extremely brand loyal. I guess this comes from loving Apple for so long, but if I find a brand of clothing I really like or brand of electronics I really like, I usually will only buy that brand. Polo, Oakley, Apple, BMW, Craftsman, Swatch are a few of my favorites.
5. I secretly want to be a police officer. I absolutely cannot get enough of these COP shows. I must watch 5-10 hours of these shows a week. They never get old either. I love watching and hearing what these idiot criminals will do to get out of being arrested. I would love to dive around at high speed all the time busting bad dudes every day. Plus the brotherhood that comes with the job seems intriguing to me as well.
6. I love a good party. You may have noticed that I love throwing parties. I just love being surrounded by friends and laughing about stupid stuff and taking about nothing. It's great fun to be surrounded by friends. I love being hospitable.
7. I love music and movie posters. I've got posters of the Smashing Pumpkins, Pearl Jam, Nirvana, and some other movie posters in my apartment. I don't really have any "art" on my walls.
So I am now throwing it out to my friends:
Jessica
Roach
Kelly
Mrs. Juicebox
Amy
Matt
Andrea
Tommy
Looking forward to reading your posts!
1. I am a darn good cross-stitcher. About 3 months ago, I started on a little project for my pals in Austin, Jeremy and Jessica Jeremy actually gave me the idea from this website called Subversive Crossstitch. Basically it's a bunch of mildly to extremely offensive crossstitch patterns you can make. I am by no means an expert at crossstitching, but my mom taught me how to do it a number of years ago, and now I am pretty good at it.
2. I like ballet. Once a year, I like to go see the ballet. It's doesn't really fit with my typical "manly" activities like fixing the car, or rolling in the dirt with the dog, but I do enjoy it about once a year. I haven't gone since I lived in Austin, but I will probably go again sometime soon.
3. I like to bake. More specifically, I like to use my kitchenaid mixer. Jessica turned me on to this awesome piece of machinery about 2 years ago, and now I love to throw anything I can together and mix it all up.
4. I am extremely brand loyal. I guess this comes from loving Apple for so long, but if I find a brand of clothing I really like or brand of electronics I really like, I usually will only buy that brand. Polo, Oakley, Apple, BMW, Craftsman, Swatch are a few of my favorites.
5. I secretly want to be a police officer. I absolutely cannot get enough of these COP shows. I must watch 5-10 hours of these shows a week. They never get old either. I love watching and hearing what these idiot criminals will do to get out of being arrested. I would love to dive around at high speed all the time busting bad dudes every day. Plus the brotherhood that comes with the job seems intriguing to me as well.
6. I love a good party. You may have noticed that I love throwing parties. I just love being surrounded by friends and laughing about stupid stuff and taking about nothing. It's great fun to be surrounded by friends. I love being hospitable.
7. I love music and movie posters. I've got posters of the Smashing Pumpkins, Pearl Jam, Nirvana, and some other movie posters in my apartment. I don't really have any "art" on my walls.
So I am now throwing it out to my friends:
Jessica
Roach
Kelly
Mrs. Juicebox
Amy
Matt
Andrea
Tommy
Looking forward to reading your posts!
Sunday, November 30, 2008
I met Billy Corgan
Jessica and I went to the St. Louis Smashing Pumpkins show on the night before Thanksgiving. About 3 months ago, this company called "I Love All Access" was offering tickets along with a chance to meet the band, and couple other nice things for a single price. Since the Smashing Pumpkins are a favorite band of Jessica's and mine, we decided to pony up the cash and go. Since I wasn't sure how popular the tickets were going to be, I had my computer ready as soon as the tickets went on sale so I could make sure that I got them. What I didn't know until the night of the concert was that I was the FIRST person to buy the tickets, and therefore had front and center tickets for the actual concert. Never in my life have I ever sat so close at a rock concert. It was AMAZING. We were so close to Billy we could have reached out and touched him. We even scored two discarded picks during the show. Of course I will be holding on to it forever and ever ;)
So in addition to sitting in the front row, we had an opportunity to meet Billy Corgan and Jimmy Chamberlin before the show started, get one thing signed, and ask them a few questions. They mostly talked about how the music industry has changed since the 90's and that "everyone steals music," and "no one buys albums anymore." Jessica and I both agreed that we really didn't care what they talked about, we just wanted to sit and listen to them talk. After the Q&A session, we walked back out to the lobby with Jimmy and Billy, and they actually stood and talked to us a little more. Jimmy turned out to be a really nice and outgoing guy. He's even a Mac user! ;) Needless to say, Jessica and I were star-struck, and we'll probably do this again if we get the opportunity.
Here is one of the pictures I took from our seats:
So in addition to sitting in the front row, we had an opportunity to meet Billy Corgan and Jimmy Chamberlin before the show started, get one thing signed, and ask them a few questions. They mostly talked about how the music industry has changed since the 90's and that "everyone steals music," and "no one buys albums anymore." Jessica and I both agreed that we really didn't care what they talked about, we just wanted to sit and listen to them talk. After the Q&A session, we walked back out to the lobby with Jimmy and Billy, and they actually stood and talked to us a little more. Jimmy turned out to be a really nice and outgoing guy. He's even a Mac user! ;) Needless to say, Jessica and I were star-struck, and we'll probably do this again if we get the opportunity.
Here is one of the pictures I took from our seats:
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